friclge:

I don’t wanna go to work. I don’t wanna grow up. I’m not going, I’m going to stay home and watch Mulan

(via officialcatbutt)

leonkumquat:

when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank

they’re married now

(via alexander-da-gr9)

pulpdrinker:

sex tip!! when he puts it in, yell ‘what are u doing in my swamp’

(via sassybroccoli)